Things I would never do naked:
- Walk in front of my deck doors at night with the blinds open and lights on.
- Stand in front of my deck doors at night with the blinds open and lights on WHILE ironing.
Yesterday morning I got my first nosebleed of 2012, because I'm too dumb to be proactive about my aching sinuses and dry boogers until my nose starts bleeding. It's clear that at this point in my life I'll never learn. I've accepted it.
Because Peter loves me and cares more about my dry sinuses than I do, he told me that he was going to take me to Fleet Farm to get a humidifier. I think that he decided to take me there because I've been talking about getting a new humidifier that holds more than a gallon of water and costs more than $10 (when it comes to humidifiers, the more you spend, the better. Trust me.) for months, but hadn't done it. And I also think that he is starting to think about the fact that in two months he will be waking up next to me for the rest of his life, and he doesn't do well with blood. But that's beside the point.
ANYWAY, we got to Fleet Farm 5 minutes before it closed, so I pretended like I was on Supermarket Sweep and ran around the store until I found the humidifiers, told Peter to pick one out, and ran to the front to pay. We even had a minute to spare! I would have been so good at that show. When we got back to my apartment, it was snowing, and I was walking to the door as Peter was getting the humidifier out of the car.
Because I am a creep and nosy, I always look into other people's windows when the blinds are open. And I should have learned my lesson. When I looked up, I saw a naked man walking in his living room! With the lights on! And the blinds open! I quickly averted my gaze and then I couldn't stop laughing. I was so shocked! I was not prepared to see that!
Of course, after that little incident, I didn't learn my lesson to mind my own business, because if you don't you might see a naked body that you aren't supposed to be seeing.
Tonight when I got home from babysitting, I looked up into the apartment where lives the naked man.
And this time, he was ironing.
In front of the window.
With the blinds open.
And lights on.
Now THAT could end very, very badly.